Why Mindset Work Wasn’t Enough for Me — and What Changed When I Worked With My Nervous System Instead

For years, I believed mindset was everything. That if I could just think better, I’d feel better. Perform better. Parent better. Run my business better.

I taught mindset. I coached mindset. I lived mindset.

But my body kept saying: this isn’t working.

The Warning Signs I Ignored

By 2024, I had been dealing with chronic back pain for years. As a yoga teacher, this made no sense. I was teaching multiple classes a week. I was moving. Stretching. Demonstrating poses. Doing all the things that are supposed to support a healthy body.

Instead, my flexibility was decreasing.
My muscles were tightening.
My pain was increasing.

I kept pushing anyway.

At the same time, I was also "onto something" in my work. I was beginning to talk about self-trust and conviction. I could sense that regulation mattered — but I didn’t yet understand it in my body. I understood it intellectually.

And that difference matters more than I realized.

The Moment Everything Became Impossible to Ignore

In the spring of 2024, my back pain reached a breaking point.

I was preparing for a girls’ trip that included hiking and adventure — and I was quietly terrified that I would be the one holding everyone back. Some days, I could barely walk my dog around the block. One morning, I woke up and couldn’t get out of bed.

I did what many high-functioning women do:
I tried to fix the problem.

Chiropractor visits three times a week.
Money spent. Effort applied. No real change.

The stress was so baked into my baseline, I didn’t even recognize it as stress.
It just felt… normal.

But my nervous system did recognize it. And it was doing exactly what it was designed to do: protect me.

Then something unexpected happened.

I went on the trip — to Washington State, into the quiet green of the Pacific Northwest — and the pain disappeared. Completely. Immediately.

No gradual easing. No "maybe it’s helping."
Just… gone.

When I returned home, I walked into my office and felt my body seize. The pain came back instantly.

That was the first time my body made the message unmistakable.

Why Mindset Coaching Alone Wasn’t Enough

At the time, I was deeply immersed in mindset-based coaching. I had trained, certified, and fully bought into the framework:

Thoughts → Emotions → Actions → Results.

And while this model is useful, something about it began to feel off in my body.

Whenever I raised a concern — in business, in capacity, in exhaustion — the answer was always the same:

“Look at your thoughts.”

The problem? I was looking at my thoughts.

I was doing the models.
I was applying the tools.
I was showing up as an A-plus student.

When the results still weren’t coming, the implication was subtle but heavy:

If it isn’t working, you must be doing it wrong.

That was confusing.
It was shame-inducing.
And it quietly eroded trust in myself.

I wasn’t avoiding the work. I was investing. Betting on myself. Taking action.

What I didn’t know yet was this:

No amount of intentional thinking can override a nervous system that believes it is unsafe.

That’s not a mindset problem.
That’s a survival problem.

The Body Is Upstream

What I had access to — without fully realizing it — was a regulated state.

Through yoga, breath, and slow, embodied practices, my nervous system occasionally found safety. And in those moments, something remarkable happened:

Focus returned.
Clarity emerged.
Decision-making slowed down — and improved.

When the body felt safe, intentional thought became available again.

This is the piece I was missing.

Mindset work operates downstream.
The nervous system lives upstream.

When survival is running the show, the body will always win. And it’s designed to.

What Changed When I Stopped Forcing

Here’s the part that still surprises me.

In the last two years, I have not actively tried to grow my business. I haven’t chased clients. I haven’t forced funnels. I haven’t hustled.

And yet — my business has grown more in that time than in the previous eight years combined.

Clients returned.
Referrals came in.
Opportunities found me.

Not because I thought harder — but because my system was no longer blocking connection, creativity, or capacity.

The same shift happened at home.

Before regulation, I was reactive with my kids. Short-tempered. Rushed. Dictatorial — not because I wanted to be, but because my nervous system felt like everything was urgent.

After regulation, something softened.

My son once told me, after studying parenting styles in a psychology class, that I had moved from authoritarian to collaborative. That comment mattered more to me than almost anything else.

I wasn’t trying to be a better parent.
My body simply had more space.

This Is Why Mindset Alone Wasn’t Enough

Mindset work is not wrong.
It’s just not sufficient on its own.

When the nervous system is stuck in survival, the body prioritizes protection over possibility.
That’s not failure — that’s biology.

Regulation doesn’t make you passive.
It makes you available.

Available for focus.
Available for creativity.
Available for aligned action.

This is the work I do now — not by bypassing the mind, but by supporting the system that makes intentional thought possible in the first place.

💡 What This Work Looks Like in Practice

Today, I work with high-functioning women who are tired of high-functioning.

They’re founders, coaches, entrepreneurs, and professionals who’ve mastered the art of over-performing — and are ready to do things differently.

Not from burnout.
From capacity.
From regulation.
From steady state.

If you’re curious what nervous system-informed coaching could look like for you, join The Self-Trust Jumpstart or get on my email list for weekly insights, nervous system strategies, and sustainable success practices.

About the Author

Janeen Alley is a somatic coach, yoga and mindfulness teacher, and former productivity and mindset coach with over a decade of experience working with high-functioning women. Her work focuses on nervous system regulation, embodied self-trust, and helping clients move out of survival mode into sustainable clarity and capacity.