When Meditation Feels Harder Than Hustle

I’ll be honest: for years I believed meditation was the missing piece.

You know the image—cross-legged, eyes closed, calm breath, 20 minutes of ‘inner peace.’ (I’m imagining Master Shifu—the twitchy little fox from Kung Fu Panda.)

I bought the albums (ALL of them—I’m not one to do something halfway). I cleared a space in our cold, drafty basement in Germany. “Maybe this will finally calm my chaos,” I thought, clutching my Oprah & Deepak playlist like it was a lifeline.

Except… I couldn’t.

In that first session, I started the timer and barely made it two and a half minutes before I wanted to poke my eyes out. Brain racing like a pinball machine. Body buzzy and restless.

Let’s just say I didn’t feel “soothed” or “settled”—quite the opposite, actually.

What I later learned is this: when your nervous system is taxed—overstimulated, misaligned, or stuck in survival rhythm—static meditation doesn’t calm you, it can trigger you.

Here’s what research tells us:

A review of mindfulness-meditation interventions shows benefits for attention, emotional regulation, and well-being.

But a recent study of novice meditators found that static seated meditation often increased heart rate and sympathetic activation (the “go” side of your nervous system) instead of creating calm.

In plain language: if your system is already racing or disconnected, telling it to sit still and breathe might be like asking a racecar to idle in first gear—it wants neutral, but you’re on the gas and the brakes at once.

So what changed for me—and what I now coach—is not just meditation, but nervous system regulation: the combination of body-first tools, somatic awareness, and practice rhythms that actually prepare the system to sit still instead of forcing it.

Here’s how I shifted:

I moved from agonizing silent 20-minute sits to movement and breath that felt alive, so my body could actually feel safe.

I learned to feel the cues in my body—tight shoulders, low back ache, that “I’m doing all the things—and still can’t exhale” feeling—and listen.

I realized the business, the marketing anxiety, the “what funnel next” loops weren’t strategy problems. They were regulation problems. My system was taxed. My internal engine was maxed out—and the warning lights were everywhere: my back, my bandwidth, my business.

I started to integrate day-to-day micro-practices that engaged my nervous system before I ever sat quietly: breathwork, gentle yoga, movement with intention, small resets between calls. Then when I did sit—stillness didn’t feel like a cage. It felt like a cushion.

My shift looked like this: From “If I can just sit still for 20 minutes I won’t feel so frazzled.” To “I’ll do what my body can hold, so stillness becomes a release—not a punishment, but a gift.”

And guess what happened?

My body got curious instead of locked. My back pain started to ease—not because of a new strategy, but because I stopped forcing. My nervous system learned safety. My business started to operate from my system—not despite it.

If you’ve ever sat for meditation and walked away feeling worse (agitated or irritated, foggy, numb, distracted)—you’re not doing it wrong. Your system is just trying to say: “I need regulation before I can handle quiet.”

✨ If you’re ready to move meditation past the cushion Start with The Self-Trust Jumpstart—my mini-course that helps you regulate your system, rebuild self-trust, and take aligned action that holds.

👉 Enroll in The Self Trust Jumpstart right here! 

All my best!
xo, Janeen