Resolution Tips When You Feel Discouraged

productivity Jan 11, 2022

I don't know about you, but I have not had my usual excitement around setting goals this year.  It's tough to plan when we're starting to lock things down again and some things still feel out-of-your control.  Or maybe you've had some big disappointments in 2021 that have left you wondering if you'll ever reach your goals. 

Here are some tips to help you stay focused, have fun, and make some exciting progress this year. 

Slow down: Reflect and Clarify. 

Don't skip this!  This step might feel a bit tedious, but it's the most important step to getting your mojo back. 

Slowing yourself down helps you to stop making untrue blanket statements like, "I never reach ANY of my goals!" and asking unhelpful questions, "Why can't I ever get this?!"  And instead, will help you see what you DID make progress in last year, which helps you gain some emotional momentum. This process will also help you gain clarity around WHY something didn't work and HOW to do it differently moving forward. 

Helpful questions to ask are: 

  • What did I do well?  What am I proud of?  
  • What are some habits I want to keep doing? 
  • What are some things that didn't go as well as I hoped? 
  • What could I do better?  How? 
  • What are some things I would like to STOP doing?  
  • What are some things I'd like to START doing?  How am I going to do that?  

Don't tell yourself you don't know.  Sit with these questions until your brain starts to come up with some ideas.  If you really don't know, how could you find some answers? 

Get Set. 

I mentioned above that I was not in the spirit of resolution writing for the first week or so of the new year.

One of the things that helped me get going was decluttering and organizing.  Having a clean space helps my creativity and ideas flow so much easier when I'm not bumping up against things and I'm thinking, "gah, I gotta get to that!"

I cleaned out my closet, put all the holiday decorations away, and built a brand new website (something that has been on my list for a few months).  

I feel like I can breathe and I have a fresh start!  Now I'm SET! 

Tiny Wins = Big Momentum.

So often we get overwhelmed thinking about our big goal. If we're in this headspace when we get started, we either don't start at all or we end up biting off more than we can chew which is a sure recipe for disaster.

I was coaching someone the other day who wanted to exercise regularly.  She was telling me she couldn't exercise because she felt like she wasn't eating right and wanted to eat right so she could have some energy to exercise and she wanted to go to bed early so she could wake up early to get it done. I could see why she was getting overwhelmed with it all!

When our brains start to do this, just STOP!  All you need to focus on is how you can create a tiny, small win!  And make it as easy as possible.  

Using exercise as an example, you don't need to do anything extra to make it happen. You could turn on some tunes and have a dance party for 5 minutes (win!) or you could take your kids out for a walk for 20 minutes (win!) or you could walk up and down your stairs 10 times (win!).  Easy, fun, and done! 

Create a Not-to-do-list. 

I learned this lesson from Michael Hyatt.  Purging is so good for us! 

What are you NOT going to do this year?  What habits do you have right now that you would like to stop because they're NOT serving you? 

Maybe you need a social media fast or you need to bow out of a committee you dread or you stop planning things on Friday night so you can have some downtime.

All of these things go on your Not-to-do-list.  Declare it.  Make it BOLD and LOUD so you see it often to remind yourself that you don't want these things to be a part of your life any more.  

Time Block It. 

Now that you've got an idea of what you're going to do - WHEN are you going to do it?  

Put it on your calendar.  Don't schedule ANYTHING on top of it.  Hold yourself to that appointment like you would for The Pope, or Oprah, or a Specialist you've waited 6 months to see.  You are DEFINITELY that important! 

Reign Yourself In.

If you're like me, you have a LOT of ideas! 

When I bring all my plans and ideas up with my husband he kind of braces himself.  I think he does this because in the past when I've take on too many things my projects have started to become his projects.

I've gotten much better about focusing on ONE thing at a time because I've embraced the concept of constraint.  When I get a new idea I put it on The List - it's an actual list in the Notes on my phone. Some of these ideas sound crazy after they've sat there for a week or two and get deleted and some ideas have stayed and become projects that I've made time for and finished. Either way, I get the idea out of my head so they aren't continuing to spin and keep me distracted.

Create a system to reign yourself in.  The way I have things set up I'm reminded that I can do whatever I want to do - just not all this week!  

When it comes to your goals pick ONE that you want to focus on and go for it.  Everything else goes on the list.  :-) 

Have a beautiful week, my friend!  xo, Janeen

 

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